What are your thoughts about the idea of being self-made? Recently, I saw a man wearing a t-shirt with the caption, “SELF-MADE!”  It was written in CAPS and seemed to scream at me, emphasizing the point. It got my attention, perhaps because earlier that day a client and I talked about how interdependent we really are. How, alone, […]

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You’re a control freak and you know it.  But you can’t find your way clear of this stressful, energy-stealing frame of mind.  Oprah.com contributor Martha Beck offers 5 tips to help you get comfortable with letting go. Relax your need to relax.  If you’re trying to relax, you’re not actually relaxing. Give yourself permission to be as tense […]

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While conflict is inevitable and can be seen as the healthy manifestation of competition, how we engage during conflict is key.  A little self-awareness can go a long way to help us steer away from behavior that serves no one.  Here are a few well-worn ruts to resist. The “I’m right, you’re wrong” mindset.  A hint that you’re […]

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Confirmation bias is when we seek out information that validates our own point of view.  We tune out everything that doesn’t align with our world view or reinforce our opinions of the people around us.   Confirmation bias closes our hearts and minds to the full truth.   But there are ways to open our minds and learn to […]

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Sometimes opportunities that we weren’t expecting come our way – something that seems like such an unlikely fit, it wasn’t even on our radar.  It may even be something we think we didn’t even want. Your first instinct may be to say thanks, but no thanks.   But, before you do, hear the person out.  Allow them to explain […]

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Living in the present sounds like such a simple goal – unless you’ve tried it.  If you have, you know how difficult fully experiencing NOW can be.  In our professional and personal lives, it seems like a luxury to stop and focus exclusively on what we’re doing right here, right now.  Too often, we devote too much time […]

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Do you allow LIES to limit you? I don’t know anyone who doesn’t. LIES are labels, illusions, excuses and stories that exist in your mind, just out of awareness.  They shape your thoughts, feelings, decisions and actions. LIES lead to detours on your path to happiness.  They short-circuit your ability and willingness to change and grow.  LIES cause you to work […]

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The kind of environment we work in plays a big role in job satisfaction.  Yet, that environment is largely controlled by another person:  your manager, or someone at or near the top of the org chart.  If they’re supportive, job satisfaction soars. Forbes.com says this is especially true for millennials. If you’re one of the people at or […]

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Researchers at University of California, Davis set out to answer an age-old question:  what makes an emotionally healthy person? They looked at what’s called the “big five” personality traits to see where healthy people landed.  Those traits are neuroticism, extraversion, openness to experience, agreeableness and conscientiousness.  They also identified facets of these traits, which added specificity. The experts […]

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According to many experts, we fear public speaking more than we fear death.  But if speeches or presentations aren’t something you can avoid, Fast Company offers these prep tips to help hide anxiety. Pace Yourself.  Avoid rapid-fire delivery by tapping into your natural and comfortable walking rhythm. Before you’re on stage, observe your relaxed pace and try to […]

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Steve Jobs once said, “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your inner voice.” Through early conditioning, most of us blind ourselves to the best of who we really are. We become untrusting, too busy, too intellectual, too committed to rules […]

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I enjoy this time of year. And, it’s seems many others do, as well. It’s a season of fun-filled gatherings and sharing good wishes. Kindness, warm smiles, fun-filled gatherings and generosity are legitimized in all dimensions of life. Perhaps you and your co-workers are making plans for a luncheon at a local restaurant, a shared […]

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I bet you still have parties, dinners, drinks and drop-bys on your holiday social calendar. Whether it’s a company-sponsored event, a colleague-hosted gathering, or a party with family and friends, put your best foot forward. Steer clear of “too many” and “too much.” Too many bad jokes. Too much heated political debate. Too many misplaced […]

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A while ago, I came across a quote that stuck with me. It read, “A quiet mind is able to hear intuition over fear.” I stumbled onto this quote at a time when my mind was racing with thoughts of daily life. People were tugging at me from various directions. Internally, I was putting pressure […]

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Change tends to push us out of our comfort zone, which generates fear. But, as Winston Churchill once said, “There is nothing wrong in change, if it is in the right direction. To improve is to change, to be perfect is to have changed often.” What a great reframe! Churchill’s quote reminds us that not […]

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My book LIES That Limit, and much of my work, revolves around the labels, illusions, excuses and stories we tell ourselves. These LIES don’t just keep us from becoming successful, they keep successful people from achieving genuine happiness. When I encounter a client who has reached a breaking point, it’s usually because they have woven and are […]

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One of the behavior patterns I’ve worked on with many leaders is their need to be right and show others that they have all of the answers.  They know more and best. Insisting on being right is alienating. It turns others off. After all, if you’re always right, that automatically makes others wrong. Artist and […]

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 As the year winds down, it’s a good time to think through the ways you’ll make the next year even better. Although every day represents the possibility of a new journey, the new year is widely recognized as an important opportunity to think big and go big.   As Oprah says, “Your journey begins with […]

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Report after report reminds us how important it is to be self-aware. One of the foundational components of Emotional Intelligence, self-awareness enables us to know our triggers, and what it takes for us to open our minds to new and different experiences and people. To become more self-aware, regularly, take a few minutes to connect […]

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