contributor Tom Bilyeu offers tips on how to up-end our human tendency to be critical of self and others. He encourages us to recognize our triggers and choose our reactions.

For example, replace the tendency to criticize with compliments. Why? Because criticism doesn’t work so well in interpersonal relationships. So, resist the tendency to tune in to the negative. When you feel compelled to criticize, use it as a trigger to offer a sincere compliment or thank you.

Let the pressure to perform remind you that life is about practice. Feeling pressure can be positive, but too much may have a negative impact. So, reframe the situation. View it as practice rather than performance.

Finally, substitute feelings of insecurity with excitement for learning. Adding the word “yet” to something you’re struggling with can make thoughts of failure temporary and transient.