It was New Year’s Day, 2010.  Our group of seven, accustomed to our well over twenty years annual New Year’s Eve ritual – a sleep-over and time together the next day – we were relishing the pleasure of each other’s company and the joy and comfort of this predictable part of life.  Each year hosted by different ones of us, everyone contributes to the fare, easing the burden of the host(s).

As our conversation turned to our wishes for the year ahead, also a predictable part of our two-day party, we talked about what we wanted to create and experience in the year ahead.

This year, my husband, Bill, posed the opening question in an interesting way, asking, “What do you have to unlearn in 2010 and the coming decade?”

Each person, in turn shared comments.  It’s always a heart-warming exchange to talk deeply in the bosom of supportive company.  Honesty and depth is easier when relationships are respectful and nurturing.

Out of respect, for everyone’s privacy, and the tenderness of the moment, I won’t share what we said.  I’m sharing Bill’s question, with his permission.  I happen to like it a lot.

What do you have to unlearn in order to take the next step in your life?  What do you have to let go of in order to free yourself up for whatever new opportunity is knocking on your door?

My answer:  I’m working on being bold and courageous; on doing what I’ve never done before; on speaking my truth, respectfully, in more and more places, and with a wider audience. I give myself the gift of freedom – the freedom to express myself in the best way I know how, at any given moment.

All of my career, I’ve lived in the shelter of the corporate world.  It’s familiar.  I know most of the rules of engagement.  I know how to get along there, and a little about how to get ahead.

This year, my bold and courageous act is to move into a new world – more into the public domain, a world that’s far less familiar.  I’ve taken that goal on with seriousness.  The evidence?  This blog.  I never thought I would do this – write blurbs to people I’ve never met and who I’m unlikely to meet or dialogue with, face-to-face, or even voice-to-voice.

I’ve also had some of my writing published, appeared on television, and my book, LIES That Limit , will be released this summer.  I’m making the move.  And in so doing, I’m unlearning some things as I learn the new.  For example, I’m unlearning explaining at length to make a point.  I’m learning to talk in headlines and still say what I mean.

What about you, what are you unlearning?

  1. Wow! Great blog article Teressa. I like it alot and want to “unlearn some LIES” myself. Thanks to Bill for asking that provocative question, and thank you for sharing!

      • Ken,

        Great to hear for you. i hope you’re well and happy. I think of you often.

        I’m glad you’re still interested in my book. It’s been a long time coming. As soon as it’s ready for distribution, I’ll let you know. It should be available late summer.

        Thanks for writing. I hope you’ll subscribe to my blog, post comments occasionally, and encourage others – family, friends, colleagues – to do so, as well.

        Keep well. Look forward to seeing you again, sometime.


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